Some people openly criticize you – either to your face or behind your back. Because I blog, I feel like I put myself under a microscope and am basically inviting people to ridicule me. Which is great because I definitely don’t have social anxiety… (Just kidding, please like me).
Most people are optimistic and nice and aren’t the worst. But some people ARE the worst and that’s just their problem. Ha! But really, you kind of can’t do anything about other people’s attitudes. There are external forces making them who they are – things that you don’t have control over. What’s that phrase? What Sally says about Susie says more about Sally then Susie. So true! Sally’s a total B. (I recognize the irony there. Sorry for being mean. Also sorry if your name is Sally – I’m sure you’re great.)
Your mom will probably tell you that girls are mean because they’re jealous. Speaking as a former occasional mean girl (sorry to everyone who knew me in middle school) that’s not always true. I mean sometimes it is, but most of the time I would be hateful to girls just because my middle school self thought they were weird/lame. Which means I didn’t have good perspective in my life or about myself. I was too short sighted to appreciate that people can have different interests and even look completely different from me – and be legit amazing humans. It’s natural to want to hang out with people that resemble us and reject those who have differing interests – it’s called implicit bias. It’s when you are unintentionally biased toward something or someone. Our brains tell us to gravitate toward people who have the same interests or look similar to us. It seems easier to strike up a conversation with a stranger when they have shoes on like we do.
There’s a crazy study on the science behind this theory that some really smart people did. But I’ll put it in my own words because that’s more fun. (I’m basically The Skimm for scientific studies. I’m also Junie B. Jones. Holla if you remember those books). Basically, the scientists took some little babies and let them choose between two different snacks! (Yum!) Then they had a little puppet show with two puppets. One chose the same snack as the kid and the other one chose the snack that the child rejected (I would be kicked out of this study because I would eat both).
Then, the child was offered one of the puppets to play with. Majority of the time, the kid wanted to play with the puppet that ate the same snack as him/her. That’s because we naturally like people (or inanimate objects like puppets) that like the same things as us.
So when there are “lame” people that like to blog in their free time, for example, you probably don’t like them or are judging them because you don’t have the same interests as them (@haterz who dis my blogging skilzzz – P.S. Sorry I just used so many Z’s. I was trying to be intimidating. Also I’m sorry I have literally a million parentheses in this post but this is how my brain works. New drinking game: drink every time I use parenthesis! You are 8 shots behind, get to work.)
Another reason I was an occasional mean girl in middle school – I was crazy insecure. Still am a little bit! Which I try to deal with a little better than I did in middle school – a work in progress I guess! Sometimes judging other people comes out of our own insecurities.
I genuinely believe that confident, strong people, are nice because they know that being kind (or at least not being a jerk) doesn’t take anything away from their strong aura. Know what I’m saying? Insecure people, on the other hand, can be jerky jerk faces (to quote Michael Scott), because they feel that by comparing your “weirdo” life to theirs, it makes them a tad stronger. Now, most haters are not self aware enough to realize this. I certainly wasn’t. And telling them is probably not the way to get around it.
If you’re judgemental or a hater sometimes (I totally can be, btw.) you need to read this book immediately. It’s called the Glass Castle and it totally changed how I look at people. If you’ve seen the movie that’s fine too but the books are always better, fact. It’s all about accepting people that are totally weird and crazy, like your parents (except for this chic’s parents were actually crazy) and being okay with the fact that you’re a different from them…and both are just fine!
This brings me to my GROUNDBREAKING AND POTENTIALLY CONTROVERSIAL THOUGHT: You don’t have to be offended by other people’s life choices (i.e. political stance, a mistake they made that you want to hate them for, their not-cute-in-your-eyes wardrobe, the weirdo they are dating, the pictures they post on instagram, or what they choose to do in their freetime). You legit don’t have to worry about any of that because you aren’t living their life. Huzzah! You are free! You don’t have to do any of the things they do that you hate! We all get to make our own life choices which is just great!
However, the downside, is that when you talk about that stuff they do/wear/date that you don’t like, you are bringing it into your life by dedicating air talking about it. Quit it, sister! If it bugs you, think to yourself, “yeah that chick is living her life and I don’t like it – good thing I have my life! Woop! Go me!”
Parentheses Drinking Game Count: 14!!!
- Haterz are insecure.
- Adding z’s to the end of haterz makes you sound more intense, thus, scaring off the haterz.
- Sometimes I’m a hater and I just need to take a step back and remember people can live their life and I don’t have to agree and they don’t have to agree with how I’m living mine.
- I love parentheses.
- Read The Glass Castle
- Tha end.